Why You Clicked for 'About'

I am not psychic, so I can not definitively say, beyond reasonable doubt, that you chose to look at my more incoherent ramblings after seeing my pathetic spiel about how 'awful' my life is, and how I'm always suffering (which... technically, I am!), to find more reason to pity me, but! I suspect that may be why. Now, In all honesty, I really couldn't care any less if someone on the internet hears my story, clutches their pearls, and wipes a few stray tears from their eyes. I will never know that you feel that way, unless you make a point to contact me (somehow) and exclaim your woes for how my life has unfolded thus far... So save your tears! I am doing very, very well! especially if you ignore all aspects of my life I am not excelling in! which brings me to my next topic...

Why I Am Not Excelling In Life

For most internet users, it has become common to hear people use grating AI voiceovers of people talking about how everyone in their family is dying, how nothing ever goes their way, and worst of all, their mother asked them to throw the rotting food out of their room!
Personally, I really couldn't care any less. So this isn't going to be me begging for support, or comfort, or asking you to spend the money you would've spent on coffee towards a fund to get me weed and alcohol. No! instead, I am going to complain! plain and simple, with no need for anything other than a listening keyboard. You can skim over all this if you want, doesn't make any difference to me.